And Then It’s Gone

10 April, 2015 

It's the night before Derek and Hillary's wedding.  Derek is Dad's oldest grandson.  Mom's been asked to say something during the ceremony.  It's the rehearsal.  As the bride comes down the aisle Dad tries to stand.  It would be perfectly acceptable for him to stay sitting in his wheelchair - it's only the rehearsal, but he wants to stand.  He always has.  Nikki, a granddaughter, comes over and together we hold him.  One of those proud-to-be-your-son moments.

After the rehearsal, the wedding party takes off for the groom's dinner.  It's hard for Dad to hear and follow a dinner conversation in a noisy restaurant with a lot of people so Dad and I take off for dinner on our own - just the two of us.  We end up at the Mall of America.

Dad says he would like to eat at a good Chinese place.  As we walk/ride by Toni Roma's he says,  "Or ribs would be good."

As we wait for the food to arrive, I decide to ask a question.  I will never forget where the answer led.    

I ask,  "What do you miss most about the house?

He replies, without having to think, "The house."

He turns away, his face fighting the emotion he tries to hide.  

He says, "There's so much of me in that house - all the things I did."

Silence.

"I guess I'm just too sentimental."

Silence.

He looks at me and says, "Retirement's not what I thought it would be.  One spends one's life working hard to be able to afford nice things  ...and then it's gone."